"I Love You!"

after my last post, where i was having a difficult start to my week...i logged off the computer right as lucy was waking from her nap.  i took a look at the house, and it fit my mood.  it was unorganized, messy, and just blah.  i knew i needed to tidy up because i operate better when i'm organized, and my house is clean.  but instead, i turned to being a girly-girl to lift my spirits.  i could tidy up later.

i went from t-shirt and sweats--to leopard print dress and head-wrap in about three minutes flat.  talk about lifted spirts.  you throw on a little bronzer and mascara...you might as well take me to the prom.  now that i was all fancy, i needed somewhere to go.  anywhere but here.

we loaded up and went to walmart.  i needed stuff.  like dark chocolate, glitter paint, and a new sports bra...and maybe some nail polish.  then, the moment that i had been waiting for finally happened-right in the middle of walmart.  my sweet girl, out of nowhere, in a very sincere tone says, "i love you, mommy.".  she has said it before in a repeat-after-me kind of manner.  or she has said "i love you too", after i've said it first.  although i do count those, it's not the big finale that i long for.  it's the out-of-the-blue, "i love you" that brings fireworks to my soul.  the one that is said on a whim...just because.

she said it!!  she really said it!!  to me, it's extra special to hear it in this context because i believe it's finally an "aha" moment.  that she actually feels love.  and in that moment, she wanted me to know that she most definitely did love me.  and what an honor to be on the receiving end of her first, on purpose, "i love you".

as if the leopard dress and head wrap hadn't already lifted my spirits...i was done gone crazy.  bliss to the umpteenth power.  she puckered those little lips up and planted a just because smooch on me afterwards.  you know...to seal the deal.  then, brother chimes in from the back of the buggy with a confirmed, "i love you too, mommy.".

seriously?  is this happening to me?  in the middle of the bra and underware section at walmart?  

my heart needed that.  after i grabbed each one of them by their cheeks and planted some serious affection on them, i marched around walmart with one hand on the buggy and the other one stroking lucy's little back.  i just had to love stoke one of them.

and the best part is that it couldn't have been delivered on a more fitting day, or week.  a week where that same little lovecup was making my head spin and my patience thin.  now i'm not saying that GOD pushed a button on lucy's vocal chords and prompted her to say that to me...but i can't help but give him the glory.  all i really needed was patience and strength from him...but he's so much bigger than that.

after i followed through and spent a whole evening re-reading the book, shepherding a child's heart, i was so very encouraged.  while reading the book, i realized just why i was taking this new stage with lucy so hard.  there was a part of me that was mourning the fact that i had to do it all over again.  i'm not saying that i have nathan raised and that my work is done.  it's far from over, this i know.  but, getting to this new found stage of easy peasy, has been so nice.  sooooooo very nice.  homeboy was a fireball, let me tell ya.

seeing lucy's will grow, stung a little.  i just didn't want to battle.  i just want to have fun and say "weeeeeee" all the time...and go to the beach.  is that so wrong?

but then, i realized that...no, i want to go through this with my sweet girl.  i want to guide her on the right track and when we conquer each little phase, one-by-one, we will welcome victory.  it's well worth the effort.  and it's not all fun and games.  shoot...neither is training for a half marathon.  but when i crossed that finish line...i perched my chest out, looked back at the journey, and it suddenly became every bit worth it.

when i woke up the next morning, after gobbling that book down like it was a thanksgiving feast...i was given a perfect opportunity.  lucy walked in nathan's room and slid his rubber boots on.  she clanked and bopped around the house all morning.  she had no intentions of changing out shoes anytime soon.  it was almost time to take off and she needed to put on her sandals.  i knew that she was going to be crushed.  so i say, "it's almost time to put your sandals on, sis.", to which she replies, "nooooo".

i wasn't a bit shocked.  i checked her heart.  she wasn't trying to be naughty.  she is two.  she was living high on life in her brothers boots.  when the time came, i was purposefully aware of her feelings while i stated, "i know that you want to wear brother's boots...but you can wear them later, you have to put on your sandals so you can run, jump, and play....okay?".

she whined a little but then i allowed her to pick out which sandals she wanted to wear.  she picked the shiny pink ones.  and she was happy.  it's amazing what a few choices can do for a child.  you see...she didn't get her way, which was to wear the boots.  but, her little spirit didn't break.  she didn't get punished for having an opinion to wear the boots.  instead, she was able to choose which shoes to wear instead.  it was a successful moment.  a small victory for our team.

i'm so proud of my babies.  they have such pure hearts.  i love being their first teacher.  it's quite an honor, really.

since i bought glitter paint at walmart, i was quick to put it to use.  i found this neat little learning activity on pinterest.  i got the classic glitter colors for three bucks.

i already had sandwich baggies and construction paper.  i put the glitter paint inside the baggies, and the rest is pretty much history.

nathan LOVED this.  handwriting made fun.

and guess who rocked her very first pony?

and one more thing...i strongly recommend helping yourself to a ring pop...in bed...while watching a chick flick.  talk about carefree.  "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE".

having bad days are so necessary.  it stretches you.  and it has the freshest way of making those good days that follow...extra rich.

and delicous.

pause button please!!
christy